My Trip of a Lifetime

So, I have jury duty again. I'm hoping and praying that they don't need me this time around. I really don't. I didn't have to do it the last time because we were so short staffed at my job that it would have been a detriment to the business. We are a bit understaffed again, but not like we were before.  Maybe, JUST maybe, they will dismiss me.  One can hope, right??  Ill update when I get home.   

  I have some great news about the ovarian cancer.  I had a new scan and some bloodwork done several weeks ago. The CT scan came back normal. My blood work came back normal as well. I am beyond grateful for that. I thank God everyday for that. The bloodwork is considered "normal" if my numbers are between 0 and 35. Mine was 6 when it was tested. So, it's on the low side of normal.  My husband and I are still trying to have a baby. At the same time, I am rethinking that. I want kids now. So does Patrick. I know it'll be a bit harder to conceive with only one ovary and one fallopian tube.  I've been told that this type of cancer is "slow growing". I hope that that is true. If i DO get pregnant, it will be a one and done pregnancy. Which I am now ok with.  If anyone has any thoughts and what not to give me, please feel free to do so. 

  I had jury duty today. It was definitely an interesting process. They were supposed to email and/or call if you were postponed. well I missed said email. Found it AFTER the fact. Oh well!!!  I took 2 days off of work for this. The reason I was postponed was due to staffing issues and it definitely is a detriment to the business. I need to let my GM know about being postponed, but I want and NEED 2 days off in a row!!! I really do. I haven't had time off for myself in a while, especially not 2 days off in a ROW. If you know me in real life, and we work together or have in the past, don't say A WORD to anyone please.  Today is a day for me and my husband. Tomorrow is a day just for me and cleaning up some around the house. I really need these days. Consider them as mental health days.

I got the results not too long ago. It's Stage 1c Ovarian cancer. My husband and I are both in shock.  We aren't sure what to do. The GYN Oncologist, her name is Dr. Shah, said if we were going to have kids, now is the time to do it. I want kids, but I'm questioning it now.  I haven't said anything to Patrick about it yet. I'm not sure how go bring it up. 😕 I really don't. I don't want to scare him or upset him with my worries, but he also needs to know.  If you have gone thru this before, please help me figure this out.  Am I going down the right path?? Should I have a baby?? How does one not feel conflicted?! 😕 

  Yesterday, February 21, 2022, I had surgery. I had a huge ovarian cyst (around 17 centimeters) that more than likely caused an ovarian torsion. The surgery I had was to take not only the cyst out, but the bad ovary, and the fallopian tube out.  Dr. Shah at the cancer center at St. Vincent's in Downtown Birmingham did a fabulous job at taking it out and keeping my sweet husband, Patrick, updated while I was in the OR and recovery rooms. Everyone was incredibly kind, patient, and sweet.  The nursing staff, the anesthesiologist, my doctor, everyone explained everything to me in a way that my ADHD brain could understand. It helped that I have medical experience, though. They still put it into a language that not only I could understand, but that my husband could understand. (Patrick has zero medical experience.) I am in the middle of healing. I'm sore and i already knew to expect that. I've been up walking every so often as to not get super stiff. Also, the walking should hel

About a month ago, my general manager quit. I had a panic attack while at work once I had his departure confirmed.  I needed that man more than he will EVER know. I still need him. I really do. He made the days better. He listened to me. He cared about me. Was I spoiled? Yes I was.  Is the fact that I was spoiled why, even a month later, the reason I still have a hard time. Maybe...just a little.  The worst is that I trusted this man. I trusted him SO much. And he trusted ME. He seemingly cared about me more than I care to admit.  I also have found out where he now works. I won't say it here. At least, not right now. Give him some time to settle in.  I only hope good things for him. I really do. Granted, I feel like this man broke me. Even though I feel that way, I will ALWAYS wish him the best. I will ALWAYS have his back. I know he still has mine. At least I hope he does.  Tyler, if you ever see this, please know that I am rooting for you. Please know that you can always use me a